Tales from Our "Loo". A Challenge!

[Papa]

Those of you who read my Tickler will understand this challenge. If not you should read it now.


The challenge is to create a short, humerous and utterly believable story explaining how a camera, a cell phone and a transmitter came to be deposited in our Portable Toilette. Avoiding all obvious puns please keep it "clean". The winner will be determined by the Board and will receive a free meal at the first Pilot's Briefing of the Fall.


Closing Date, Midnight, Friday June 12.


"Ladies and Gentleman start you Pens"


Go for it.


Jack.

[Andy Hoffer]

Clearly a case of FPV gone bad.

The Loo provides privacy and a perfect "cockpit" environment conducive to the concentration required for clandestine FPV, especially by newbies (who could it be???).  The enclosed space adds depth to the "immersion" experience, making it an irresistible temptation to fly by the seat of one's pants, or lack thereof.  The camera is clearly a manifestation of the narcissistic behaviour which often accompanies folks strutting their new tech toys.  The phone is a back-up for photos, but its prime purpose is to provide a means to call for help when you've ultimately lost orientation and can't find your way back to the field (all the farms start to look the same when you don't know where you're going and have no peripheral vision).  Combine all this with the inevitable loss of control and associated expletive convulsions, and the aforementioned accoutrements have no option but to ditch into the depths in a quest to disassociate themselves with the hapless pilot.

My condolences to the owner.  As they say, "Sh-- happens!"

Andy

[gmcnic]

Oh, Andy.
Are you ok?? 

[battlestu]

 I totally know what happened my pal ... let's call him "buddy" was a little bored one day. When no one was looking he would go and "hide" stuff in the "loo"

*story is entirely fictional and the names have been changed to protect "buddy"

[Crazyflyer]

Well I am pretty sure I know what happened, one of the new FPV enthusiast came to the field when no one was around. And since they knew they would be doing something illegal by flying fpv without a spotter, out of sight line, and get in trouble if one of the other members came at the wrong time, so Simon ... no sorry let's call him John decided to setup their FPV station inside the loo out of prying eyes.
John must have gotten startled when I came, I now understand what happened and why I saw a Bixler flying around with no one to be seen!!! 

[sihinch]

Simple, Dr Who flies RC.

He was testing the new DSMXterminate transmitter and wanted to record the review for Flite Test. But he received an emergency distress signal on his intergalactic communicator (that is disguised as a hello kitty iPhone) and had to leave quickly. So that no-one saw the Time Lord use his sonic screwdriver he stepped in to our loo before beaming aboard his GPS located, 6 axis controlled Tardis.

Nothing to do with me, FPV or a Bixler.

But the "Buddy" theory, hmmm....

[Papa]

Time And Relative Dimension in Space refers to a well know British Police Phone Box endowed with some extraordinary powers. When BBC Wales were starting the project the head of Programming, Sydney Newman suggested something familiar to him as a copy for the Time Machine. Being Canadian a Port-a- potty immediately sprang to mind. Thus the first TARDIS was in fact an AMPOT Port-a-Potty.

Not knowing what a Port-a-Potty was the Staffers were all mystified. After all they had Port-a-Loos and Port-a-Bogs and they thought Newman was referring to his slightly dotty old Uncle Phil in Ruislip. Not to be deterred Sydney imported a typical brown Ampot Port-a-Potty so they would have a working model on hand. Well to say the least they were not impressed and decided to opt for a much used Prop they had in the back lot. This was the Blue Police Phone Box so beloved of all Whovians.

The unfortunate Port-a-Potty languished in the constant rain in Wales but due to its indestructible nature it remained largely intact. Now as some may know there was another Time Lord who escaped from Gallifrey. Known as the Master, he became an enemy of the Doctor. They had to find a suitable Time Machine and after much futile research some old fart suggested they resurrect Sydney's original idea.

With true British humour they thought it appropriate that the Master be introduced using a ****ter to disguise his Time machine. The fact it was Canadian was even more hilarious to them with their waggish type of wit. Since the Master did not have a fixed TARDIS he used many different iterations of the Chameleon Circuit resulting in the list shown below.

In the first appearance of the Master, Roger Delgado, the actor, decided that for authenticity the scenes should be filmed in Canada. By now the series had a better budget and they came to Toronto looking for a suitably desolate spot. Finding it on the Stouffville Road they began filming and in one scene the Master, the videographer, using a smart cell phone because of the confined space, and the stills operator were inside while the Master manipulated a remote Transmitter beaming images at the Doctor who was trying to track the Master and destroy him.

Unbeknownst to them a wild Black Bear came by and intrigued by the activity, wandered up to the TARDIS. The outside crew fled; being Canadians they saw the bear and were long gone when it arrived. Opening the door it let out a horrendous howl and all three dropped their equipment, s**t their pants and were never seen in Canada again. This accounts for the broken handle on the Port-a-Potty door and finding a still camera, a transmitter and a cell phone in the last clean out.

Don't worry about the timing after all it is a Time Machine.

Some of the Master's TARDIS have been:
Horse Box
Space Ship
Fir Tree
Computer Bank
Grandfather Clock
Fluted Architectural Column
Iron Maiden
Fireplace
British Airways Jet
[size=0pt]Cottage[/size]
[size=0pt][/color]Triangular Column[/size]
[size=0pt][/color][/size]
[size=0pt][/color]I don't know how they missed the Port-a-potty but I swear it's all true.[/size]
[size=0pt][/color][/size]
[size=0pt][/color]Jack.[/size]