Morning Crew application form

[bweaver]

MORNING CREW MEMBERSHIP APPLICATION

The following application must be completed in its entirety, on the TEMAC Forum.  This step ensures transparency in the process of becoming a new Morning Crew member.  Your responses to the following questions/statements may be completed all at the same time, or completed separately as your time permits. NOTE: all 7 questions/statements must be completed prior to receipt of final membership approval. More than one response to a question/statement is permitted.

Please be aware, that your responses will be reviewed, accessed, discussed, and commented on as part of this new transparent membership process.

1 - (You can have assistance in answering this first question)
My name is...

2 - I am currently...
(a)   pretired
(b)   retired
(c)   just tired
(d)   other – please explain

3 - I can fly...
(a)   well
(b)   somewhat well
(c)   with assistance
(d)   only in an airplane
(e)   other – please explain

4 - (You are applying to join the MORNING CREW for a reason.) 
I routinely...
(a)   wake up before 10 a.m.
(b)   get up before noon
(c)   lie awake all night in anticipation of flying with wonderful people in the morning
(d)   other – please explain

5 - I wear fashionable, colour-coordinated clothing.
(a)   yes
(b)   no
(c)   sometimes
(d)   other – please specify

6 - (Complete the following statement honestly based upon your knowledge of the morning crew) 
I get the urge to...
(a)   treat everyone to lunch (Where your answer is YES please specify your preferred lunchtime locations)
(b)   bite my tongue and fane interest while listening to almost everything Dr John and other members say
(c)   leave Dr. John's and other members presence when he/they start one of his/their stories
(d)   wait in my car until most of the morning crew leaves
(e)   Other – please specify

7 - Whenever I go to the flying field I always...
(a)   am respectful and play and fly nicely with others
(b)   have deferential attitudes to all morning crew members
(c)   provide an assortment of tools so that others can make 'at field adjustments'
(d)   provide an assortment of adhesives for occasional (read 'frequent) 'at field mishaps'
(e)   complement others on their flying skills even when the compliment is not deserved
(f)   other – please specify



Successful MORNING CREW applicants must adhere to the following rules

(1) When flying with wind, it is compulsory to stand apart from others. (Never downwind)

(2) While perfecting your off-field landings you must avoid using audible bad language  (Talking to yourself in your head is permitted)

(3) When other pilots experience serious ground/air interface incidents, it is mandatory that you maintain a suitable demeanor. Snickering is not permitted. (Only a full belly laugh is permitted when the incident warrants)

WARNING:
Where new Morning Crew members fail to play properly with other flyers, they will be sent home to write 100 lines. Should the poor behaviour persist after the 1st warning, their propeller(s) will be removed.  Upon 2nd warning, their Moms or significant others will be informed!  You don't want to know what happens after the 3rd warning.

We truly hope you will be a successful applicant.

[Frank v B]

Here we go.  Bruce, put on your reading glasses and pop the lid on the first beer.

1 - (You can have assistance in answering this first question)
My name is...  My wife says it is and always has been, Frank J.M. van Beurden  (news to me! )

2 - I am currently...
(d)   other – please explain... too poor to be retired

3 - I can fly...
(e)   other – please explain  ... about one flight per plane.  That's why I have 40 planes and run the repair classes.

4 - (You are applying to join the MORNING CREW for a reason.) 
I routinely...
(d)   other – please explain ... get up at the crack of noon!

5 - I wear fashionable, colour-coordinated clothing.
(a)   yes... provided the fashion judges are from the CNIB.

6 - (Complete the following statement honestly based upon your knowledge of the morning crew) 
I get the urge to...
(a)  treat everyone to lunch once in my lifetime.  Bruce can pay for me all other times.

7 - Whenever I go to the flying field I always...
(e)   complement others on their flying skills even when the compliment is not deserved .... because they are copying my flying style.



Successful MORNING CREW applicants must adhere to the following rules

(1) When flying with wind, it is compulsory to stand apart (aphart?) from others. (Never downwind)

(2) While perfecting your off-field landings you must avoid using audible bad language  (Talking to yourself in your head is permitted)

(3) When other pilots experience serious ground/air interface incidents, it is mandatory that you maintain a suitable demeanor. Snickering is not permitted. (Only a full belly laugh is permitted when the incident warrants)

Any other questions will be promptly answered.

Frank J.M. van Beurden

[bweaver]

Frank,

Your prompt response to filling out the questionnaire was considered by most members to be positive, demonstrating your interest in joining the group.  A few members are however concerned that your wish to join us is because you may not have many other friends.

Respecting your response to question 2, (I am currently too poor to be retired) - The committee responses received to date pointed out the obvious conflict with your response to question 6, (I get the urge to treat everyone to lunch once in my lifetime.  Bruce can pay for me all other times.) In light of this, the members also suggest that you continue to pursue your goals in achieving success in this regard.

Respecting your response to question 3, (I can fly about one flight per plane.  That's why I have 40 planes and run the repair classes.) Well it goes without saying that with this record, you will be 'showing up' many in the morning crew with your skills. Your response is also consistent with your response to question 7, where you have stated 7 - (Whenever I go to the flying field I always complement others on their flying skills even when the compliment is not deserved .... because they are copying my flying style.)

Respecting your response to question 4 - (I routinely get up at the crack of noon!) This habit will have to be broken if you wish to fly with the MORNING CREW

Respecting your response to question 5 - (I wear fashionable, colour-coordinated clothing. (a)   yes... provided the fashion judges are from the CNIB.)
The committee recommends that you kindly ask the Misses to lay out your clothing for you to wear in the future.  We do have standards when we dine at high-end eateries, like Swiss Chalet, Subway and the like - should you wish to join us. NOTE - If you are paying, wear what you want.

It is obvious that Rule 1 has been applied to you in the past.  Please continue to take it seriously.

In our view at this time, (which can change at any time) you may proceed to the next phase of becoming a Morning Crew Member - "Try-outs". (NOTE: "Try-outs" continue for ever until you get it right.)

Next applicant please!

[Frank v B]

Bruce,

Thanks for allowing me to proceed to the perpetual tryout stage and avoiding the outright replies like "never", "not in your dreams", "NFW", etc.

Some clarification is needed:

re  - "Respecting your response to question 4 - (I routinely get up at the crack of noon!) This habit will have to be broken if you wish to fly with the MORNING CREW". 
Just let me paraphrase a famous song by some laid-back tequila artist "It's 10 am somewhere".  So everyone in the Morning Crew needs to set their watches/clocks 2 hours back and I will be "on-time".

re - " The committee recommends that you kindly ask the Misses to lay out your clothing for you to wear in the future."
That is absolutely cruel.  Then she will know I am missing and going to the flying field.  I will supply welder's glasses to all who are present.  That should neutralize the shock and may improve the flying skills of the existing Morning Crew members.  Better to see something than nothing.

re: ""Try-outs" continue for ever until you get it right." That's the teacher in you.... "You will do it over and over until you get it right" .  Are you implying that if I ever get it right I will no longer be on the Morning Crew?  Don't want to show you up.

Respectfully* yours,

Frank

* more lies.

[vicwhit]

Yah got it all wrong about the last supper. 1. It was on Stoofville (sic) Road in Stouffville. 2. It wasn't the last. We will have more at the drop of a hat.

[RogMason]

Well, Frank and Rob and all other rapidly aging pilots - just look at the recent turn-out of the Morning Crew  :-)

[Frank v B]

Roger,

Looks like forced labour to me.  It must be tough to decide whether to go to work or to meet with the Morning Crew.

At worst I should be considered a "rapidly aging" young pilot.  Remember that "Old" is a relative term.  When I was in grade 3, I thought people in grade 4 were old.  Flying with you guys will make us new guys feel very young.

Keep smiling, keep flying.

Frank

[RogMason]

Useful Recognition Chart and Tips sheet for new Morning Crew applicants...

[octagon]

The following application must be completed in its entirety, on the TEMAC Forum.  This step ensures transparency in the process of becoming a new Morning Crew member.  Your responses to the following questions/statements may be completed all at the same time, or completed separately as your time permits. NOTE: all 7 questions/statements must be completed prior to receipt of final membership approval. More than one response to a question/statement is permitted.

Please be aware, that your responses will be reviewed, accessed, discussed, and commented on as part of this new transparent membership process.

1 - (You can have assistance in answering this first question)
My name is...

Rob, but my wife often calls me different things than that.


2 - I am currently...

(d)   other – Wondering how I can have paid into CPP for 50 years and get so little pension!



3 - I can fly...

(e)   other – Ok, but I get a lot of practice repairing my models


4 - (You are applying to join the MORNING CREW for a reason.) 
I routinely...

(d)   other – Need help finding my lost planes, and also need someone I can trust to look after the stuff I forget at Rogo when I leave.

5 - I wear fashionable, colour-coordinated clothing.

(d)   other – I can only say it helps to be colour blind.

6 - (Complete the following statement honestly based upon your knowledge of the morning crew) 
I get the urge to...


(e)   Other –Go to the bathroom more often

7 - Whenever I go to the flying field I always...

(f)   other – Bring a big garbage bag to bring the bits home in.


Successful MORNING CREW applicants must adhere to the following rules

(1) When flying with wind, it is compulsory to stand apart from others. (Never downwind)

(2) While perfecting your off-field landings you must avoid using audible bad language  (Talking to yourself in your head is permitted)

(3) When other pilots experience serious ground/air interface incidents, it is mandatory that you maintain a suitable demeanor. Snickering is not permitted. (Only a full belly laugh is permitted when the incident warrants)

WARNING:
Where new Morning Crew members fail to play properly with other flyers, they will be sent home to write 100 lines. Should the poor behaviour persist after the 1st warning, their propeller(s) will be removed.  Upon 2nd warning, their Moms or significant others will be informed!  You don't want to know what happens after the 3rd warning.

We truly hope you will be a successful applicant.

[bweaver]

Rob, Thanks for submitting your application to join the Morning Crew. 

You're application will with all sincerity be cordially reviewed and processed.   

The morning crew has been notified of your submission and you will be the subject of much discussion at this Thursday's lunch.  You are welcome to attend if you dare.  You can even plead your case.   (noon at the Swiss Chalet, east of the 404 on MacKenzie Dr. East.) PS - BRING YOUR WALLET!

[vicwhit]

Since I will miss lunch, I think what's his name can join in on compassionate grounds as he is so despondent about losing his livelihood.
Does anybody really know this guy?
Is he constantly repairing like Jim?
Does he actually build stuff?
Can he fly in a circuit instead of grandstanding in a hover over the runway?

Oops. ..that's me.

Welcome Rob. See ya in the spring.

Vic W.

[Candu]

Bruce already knows that I am unable to make this week's luncheon so I'll give Rob a thumbs up vote here now.

Vic, you don't have to know who this guy Rob is - to me, anybody who have had a lipo fire has the required prerequisite to qualify to be a member of the morning crew...

[Athol]

In spite of all the criticism, I think Rob's a nice guy and as long as he brings lots of clear bags, for the new eco-kit process of minimising packaging, so he can take the "recently kitted plane" home to (re)build., I'm all for him joining the TMC (TEMAC Morning Crew)...

Cheers

 

[Canuke]

But is he willing to repair or rebuild other members crashed planes like Jim does?

[octagon]

Hey Guys, thanks for all the replies and consideration of allowing me to join you. It is inspirational and it warms the cockles of my heart. If allowed to join, I promise to uphold the traditions of the morning group. I will complain about the current government, the weather, the corn, my back, drones, radio signal failures and will do my best not to get lost driving to Rogo from Richmond Hill (Maybe I can follow Bruce, he hardly ever gets lost anymore). I will also write down where I am going so i don't forget and end up in Uxbridge. It is great, at 66 to be the youngest member (I think) of anything I am a part of! Oh wait, Frank VB is younger (at least he says he is)
Oh, and I do repair other's planes when I have time, but I keep myself pretty busy with my own!
Anyone know where one can get jumbo clear garbage bags? Don't want the zone director kicking me out for environmental reasons.